Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. But enough about watching Manchester United, try doing that whilst owning their defenders in FPL as well. Like turning up to a live torture event and saying PICK ME! Fuck this shit, let’s dive in to the Gameweek 36 wreckage. ONANA – 5.0 – MANCHESTER UTD Who…
Imagine waiting 35 weeks to play a wildcard for this tornado of horseshit. Players going down like they’re in Enemy of the fucking Gates the second they enter my team. Let’s dive in before two more get bloody snipered in Gameweek 35. EDERSON – 5.5 – MANCHESTER CITY I’ve been burnt by the Wildcard/Bench Boost…
What is left at this point, but to pick ourselves off the turf and somehow find a way to keep going in the face of such reckless shite. Deep breath. Let’s dive in and try and forget any of this ever happened in Gameweek 33. MURIC – 4.3 – BURNLEY Burnley have had half the…
GAMEWEEK 30’S PISS POOR THINGS I hope you all had a good Easter, sat there with your fucking roasts, chocolate and FPL points whilst some people died on the fucking cross and got none. They also didn’t get the Team of the Weak article for Gameweek 30, either. Let’s do this. LENO – 4.8 –…
KILLING OF THE CARLTON MOON Well I’m back, said Samwise Gamgee after his adventures in Middle Earth. Going to talk to you about Gameweek 29’s Team of the Weak. And so am I. Let’s dive the hell in. DUBRAVKA – 4.2 – NEWCASTLE UTD Inspiring as much confidence in the troops as General Custer on…
THE HUNGER BENCH GAMES I don’t think we need to waste any time here. Let’s dive in and not see Phil Foden absolutely anywhere. DUBRAVKA – 4.2 – NEWCASTLE I don’t want to say that Nick Pope was a big loss, but Newcastle had conceded 3 goals once in an entire year with him in…
Which players promised us so much this season… and have thus far delivered nothing but a fistful of faeces. Let’s rubber up, and dive the hell in to FPL TEAM OF THE WEAK – THE FIRST HALF. FLEKKEN – 4.5 – BRENTFORD Ranked top of Eric Freeman’s GKs for this season, Flekken has been so…
It’s important to note that the Gameweek 18 deadline of the 2023/24 FPL season is approaching quickly, and we’re entering the festive December period. With three deadlines in ten days, missing the deadline is a real possibility, so you must keep track of it. During Gameweek 18, Manchester City and Brentford will not be playing,…
THE SOLANKE GOODBYE I’m not here to stand on fucking ceremony. Let’s dive in and see what dickheads dipped themselves in urine and soiled our teams this week. Quick, before we lose our fucking points and don’t show enough respect. EDERSON – 5.5 – MANCHESTER CITY Averaging just 2.9 points per game, even calling Ederson…
The phrase ‘When it rains, it pours’ perfectly describes the scenario of the Fantasy Premier League (FPL) landscape heading into Gameweek 17. Several players have been injured or suspended amidst the looming blank Gameweek 18 for Manchester City and Brentford. This has left FPL managers in a sticky situation. Erling Haaland mysteriously missed the game…